Can you feel it too? The urge for freedom? The urge to just be yourself without all those imposed rules. On the one hand we have to be alone as much as possible – stay at home, wear face masks, keep our distance and at the same time we also have to increase our frequency because that in turn increases our immunity that could / should protect us against this virus. So we must also be grateful, meditate, be happy, be mindful, be friendly, be pain-free, eat healthily- preferably vegan and organic – to be as we say, the ideal human being.
Well I have failed enormously at that this week!
I guess I’m not alone.
I’ll give you some background information. When I was 19 years old I went to the supermarket and when I got to the checkout I heard a little voice in one ear saying, “Buy a quick pick lottery ticket. ” As a poor student at the time, I did not want to spend the money on it. The next day, 105 million Belgian francs was won by someone who had bought a quickpick ticket at the same time I was there!
When I was a bit older and madly in love, I really wanted to follow my partner to Africa. For that long journey I needed a lot of vaccinations in a very short time. I did feel that it was going to be very tough on my physical body but my crush was bigger than my concern. As a consequence I got pancreas poisoning with diabetes as a result.
You might think these 2 events were enough to make me listen to my gut. However, it took many years before I became a real intuitve person.
I know my gut feeling guides and protects me from danger but at the same time I know that there are certain things that will always take precedence over that feeling.
If one of my children needs me, I will be there, even though my gut tells me to stay away. So I call in my auxiliary troops but storm into danger as a wonderwoman.
The last few weeks I had the craziest dreams. Each time in periods of 2 weeks: 2 weeks of nightmares – 2 weeks of very sweet dreams – 2 weeks of very crazy dreams and now the last 2 weeks of dreams in which everything is mixed.
So it is with my life : a mixture of feelings of happiness and gratitude, but also fear and sadness. A good friend had a serious car accident, I was shocked. 3 other friends got the dreaded virus, another friend had a bad back injury and is in terrible pain. Another friend is struggling financially and wonders how to proceed. My own body has a hard time – my muscles cramp and that hurts. So when I read about the frequency of the virus and the frequency of humans and how you can increase that frequency, I am initially satisfied that we apparently hold our own destiny in our hands. However, countless questions arise. How high should your frequency be? How can it be measured? How long should your frequency be at this altitude? Then all joy turns into guilt and anger. Is this the new way to judge people? You get the virus because you don’t vibrate high enough?
The rebel in me awakes – where is the freedom then?
Can we still be free to feel our feelings? All feelings ? Can we observe them and decide for ourselves what it does to us? Can we fail 10 to 20 times a day? Can we also succeed? Even if it is a few minutes or many hours? Can we still allow each other the freedom to live our lives as as we wish?
Why are so many struggling? It appears that we must either be a rational person or an emotional person. You are either for or against the measures. I saw a nice post on facebook entitled, “May I also have doubts?” That is a very fair question. I have many friends and acquaintances, some more emotional, others more rational but all good people.
You can be anything to me, I grant you that freedom. Live, experience, play and dance, be happy, angry, sad, grateful, with or without pain, in love, engaged, married, divorced, it doesn’t matter to me. Be a human being, for that you came to this world to experience what it means to be human.
Dear human being, I invite you to play a play a game, in this theatrical show called life. Sometimes I am your friend, sometimes your opponent but I love you in whatever role you choose to play. I hope that increases your frequency and protects you from all things that you don’t enjoy.
Love
Annelies
